The past 30ish days really got away from me.
Not in a bad way, really. Over this hectic 30ish days, I got a lot done and had some fun.
I remodeled and leased out two units in my 8-unit property, adding to the property’s improvements, upgrading the quality of my tenants and increasing passive income.
This paved the way for refinancing this property out of its current private loan and into a lower interest loan. I found a local lender that I really like, and I’m excited to further increase my cash flow, and build a great relationship with a lender that I trust. I’ve learned that his bank has more lending options for me than other large banks, which is opening up finance and investment opportunities for me.
A friend and fellow investor is considering a 100+ unit property acquisition, and asked me to assist with feasibility. Frankly, I was honored to have this kind of exposure and insight into a project of that size, and seized the opportunity. Over coffee and some shared stories, we poured over a 100+ leases and audited them for our reports, walked vacant units, inspected exteriors, and dreamed of future upgrades and ways to add value to the community. I overheard conversations she had with the owner, the apartment building’s staff, and her lender, and learned about the nuances involved with a deal that size. I’m really excited for her and this opportunity.
My partner’s parents and their dog came to visit us for a little over a week. We travelled to a couple small towns, hiked on a huge rock, swam in a sparkling lake, then headed to our house on the edge of the city for several days. Those days at home were filled with home-cooked meals, board game nights, the occasional movie, several lively conversations, and a few bottles of wine. I dragged his mom out with me on my morning runs, where she walked and talked with my mom as I went off for my 3-mile run. We enjoyed a couple of fancy coffee drinks as a reward for our sweat sessions. Our dogs made fast friends, enjoying long walks during the day and giving the neighbor dogs hell during the evening.
A few days ago, as the parents left, I got a couple of alerts for ridiculous looking deals on a couple of properties. Eager to see these in person, I coordinated two showings the next morning with my agent and contractor and made the drive to the town I’ve been investing in. Turns out, they were ridiculous deals, but not in a good way. I made a lowball offer on one and they passed on it. And I’m fine with that – the last thing I’d want to do is overpay on that big of a project… more power to the person that got it!
Today’s run was one of the hardest. The air was thick with humidity. My lungs struggled, my legs protested, and my sweat glands were on overdrive. I got in two miles. My target these days is three, but I’ll take two on a muggy day like today. Yoga after the run was welcome. For the first time in my life, my heels touched the ground during downward dog. I cannot overstate this accomplishment. My hamstrings have been crazy tight my entire life, and this sign of flexibility is due to several months of dedicating to a few yoga classes every week. What a wonderful feeling! During today’s class, I thought about the last few weeks. I’m proud that, in spite of my hectic schedule and bump from many routines, I kept some important ones.
I enjoyed good food, and did some over-indulging, but had a good balance nutritionally. My exercise routine didn’t get too off course either. I even added a 30-day squat challenge (ouch!) to the month of October. The budget didn’t take a ridiculous hit. Sure, I bought a couple of dinners out for the family, and purchased some bottles of wine for us to share… and a couple for them to take back home with them. But it was a manageable expense that we mitigated in other areas this month – and totally worth it! I kept tabs on my properties and made headway on some important investment goals – even got exposure to a larger project, an invaluable learning experience.
On the other hand, some routines and goals went by the wayside.
My writing suffered. This blog popped into my mind a few times over the past few weeks, but the pull didn’t keep me in front of the keyboard long enough to produce words on the page. Personal journaling, creative writing and the screenplay I really need to reformat… all neglected. A stack of library books started collecting dust on my desk. My treasured monthly issue of Scientific American is right where I put it over a month ago when I brought it home from the post office. I’ve missed three or four Saturday morning hikes with my hiking group. While I managed to get in exercise elsewhere, I really enjoy this group and miss those social connections.
Taking all of this in during Shavasana, I realized refocusing on myself and my intentions is a necessary exercise for me over the next couple of days.
Frankly, we all lose track of our goals and ambitions every once in a while. Regular check-ins can keep us from going too far out of bounds. But having the flexibility to enjoy life’s adventures is the spice of life, so I try not to get too crazy sticking to my goals.
I left corporate hell for a reason 😉
With any reset, I like to take a few basic steps. It takes longer than just jotting down some goals and throwing together calendar reminders and events to keep me on track. But I think the end result is more meaningful, and paves the way for more lasting, impactful change.
Identify The Goal(s) You Missed
Articulating exactly what you’re not pursuing that you want to pursue is trickier than you may think. It’s why the whole “SMART goals” thing is a thing. In case you have not had the pleasure, SMART stands for specific, measurable, attainable, realistic/relevant, and time-bound. Creating goals using this framework is not a bad approach… but don’t adhere too strictly to this if it doesn’t serve you.
The larger point is to get away from goals, pursuits, and intentions that are too vague.
Just as important, don’t pursue a SMART goal that you don’t really believe in. These intentions should be meaningful to you. Not shallow. Instead deep and intentional.
Health has been a persistent goal throughout my life. I was never athletic, even as a child, and pursuing corporate life as a young adult did not add to a healthy lifestyle. And I typically set the same goal: I need to lose weight.
I rarely did.
If I did manage to lose weight, it was by starvation or crazy, restrictive diets that lasted no more than a few weeks. Then the weight would go right back up. Naturally, I would want to rush right into fixing it and making this my goal for next week, starting Monday morning…
But acknowledging this failure is important. Not something to be rushed through. And before pressing on, be very clear about what you failed at.
I failed at losing weight.
Before acknowledging why I failed to lose weight, I should take a moment to recognize what a lame goal this is. Sure, it looks good on the surface, but what does success look like? Losing one pound, five pounds, 10, 20, or 40 pounds? What if I don’t lose any weight, but I drop four dress sizes?
Looking critically at the goal you failed to achieve is important. It will help you reset your intentions down the road…
Acknowledge Why You Missed Them
Now we ask why… why did we fail at our goals? And more importantly, is this the right goal?
Looking back, I had loads of reasons for not hitting this goal:
- I didn’t really define how much weight I wanted to lose
- I had no plan to lose the weight. Or I made no changes in my daily life
- When I did define a weight loss goal, it was outrageous (lose 20 pounds in 30 days)
- My plan to lose weight was not sustainable (eat nothing but chicken or fish and vegetables until I achieved my weight loss goal, or eat only 1,000 calories a day)
But, if I’m honest with myself, there was a much deeper reason that I didn’t hit these goals… at least not long-term. It took a lot of inner reflection and some serious questions. The bottom line was simple:
I didn’t actually care about my weight.
Not really.
Turns out, there were other motivators that hit closer to home than some number on a scale. I wanted to accomplish physical goals, like going on several mile-long hikes, swimming in lakes, or running for miles on backcountry trails. If a friend invited me to join on an adventure that required some physical stamina, I didn’t want to second-guess what my body was capable of. Watching my family members age, I wanted to improve my quality of life in later years, to keep my health and mobility to the best of my control. And, to be frank, I wanted to look sexy naked. To feel good when I put on clothes in the morning, confident that there were no unnecessary lumps or rolls or clinging.
Once I was honest with myself about why I had these goals, I could be honest about why I missed them. I was pursuing an intention that didn’t really resonate with me. And my plans to achieve these goals were not realistic, and not in alignment with my true motivators.
Appreciate The Goal(s) You Hit
Now, just because I didn’t hit many of my weight loss goals in the past doesn’t mean it was all in vain. Over the past several years, there are several good habits and goals that I have hit. All relate to health, just not specifically weight loss. Here are some things I accomplished on my weight loss journey over the past several years:
- I cut out soda – there was a time I could drink over six cans of Coca-Cola in a day
- Also cut out sugary, box cereals in the morning
- I no longer use sugary creamer in my coffee, and opt for almond milk…
- Speaking of, I drink almond milk instead of cow’s milk
- I’ve learned how to plan meals, helping my wallet and waistline
- I have even found some snacks that satisfy my sweet tooth (dates and walnuts, protein and fruit smoothies, tea with honey) without packing on the pounds (hello ice cream, chocolate peanut butter cups, and cake)
Did these changes result in losing the over 60 pounds I had to lose at my heaviest? No, not at all. Perhaps they prevented me from gaining even more. But I still like to acknowledge these accomplishments, as they have all improved my health.
And at the end of the day, that’s what really matters to me. Improving my health and fitness.
Confirm Your Goals and Reset Your Intentions
With that, a little less than a year ago, I had a major “intentions resetting moment” with regard to my weight, health, and physical fitness. Taking in my accomplishments and failures to that point, and acknowledging my true motivators, I reset my intentions.
I no longer try to lose weight. Instead, I train.
I train to improve my fitness. And to improve my health. As a consequence, I know I’ll look sexier naked.
What’s One Thing You Can Do Every Day To Hit Your Goal?
My first goal was to complete the couch to 5k program. I had not run more than a mile since I was in middle school, and wanted to try. If I hated it, I would never do it again. Last winter, I dedicated to the program three times a week. I found parks close by and rotated through a few that were beautiful and almost made me forget about the sweat, pain and panting 😉
It took almost a whole year, but as of a couple months ago, I run 5k three times a week. Now I’m working on speed.
About spring-time last year, I wanted to swim for one mile without stopping. When the pandemic began, my gym closed for a bit, and when it reopened, swimming was restricted to 50 minutes per session. New goal, one mile in 50 minutes. One mile is 70 laps in my 25 yard swimming pool. When I first started swimming twice a week, I could do around 32. Today, I hit 62 in 50 minutes. So close! I’ll get there.
Last summer, I really wanted to incorporate some yoga and flexibility into my training. Initially I wanted to do yoga after swimming, but the idea of stacking these two on top of each other was daunting. So, at first, I would swim or run in the mornings, then take a yoga class every once in a while in the afternoons. Problem was, I felt like my life was one long gym session. A desire to have more time out of gym clothes was the push I needed to adjust my schedule and swim days to coincide with yoga and body flow classes. Now, I do a session right after swimming twice a week (with a shower in between).
This month, I began a 30-day squat challenge. I have not been attacking it perfectly, but I am slowly incorporating strength training into my routine. I’d also really like to get on the bike more as the weather is cooling off. Only so many hours in the day…
Consequently, as I’ve increased my daily exercise, I find myself eating better. When I eat a heavy meal, my run or swim the next day sucks. I’m tired if I don’t get enough protein, or calories, the day before. I can’t eat before heavy exercise, so I work out in the morning, and have a protein shake right after. While ice cream still tastes delicious, my workout the next day will be horrible. So I typically have my more indulgent desserts the day before rest day… and in moderation so my stomach doesn’t get upset.
I’ve also lost over 30 pounds.
I share this weight loss journey because it’s an intention I have had to reset, and feel like I’ve done so successfully. Sure, I’m still working on it, but that’s life. Life is about that journey. The destination is just an added benefit.
For the next few days, I will reset my intentions around reading and writing. At quick consideration, I probably had goals that were too intense. I wanted to read four books a month, and write at least two hours a day. Scaling that back to something a bit smaller will probably be more fun…
In the meantime, I just got a notification from my gym on social media. I did a body flow class after my swim session, and during class we took a group picture. I’m doing tree pose, and we all look amazing.
But, in particular, I’m looking pretty sexy in those workout clothes.